I was dying to have sex but felt like hitting until I was 32

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A WOMAN didn’t lose her virginity until she was 32 after friends said it “felt like running into a brick wall”.

Karen Buono, 38, was dying to have sex but was physically unable to do so due to a condition she was unaware of.

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Karen Buono, 38, was unable to have sex until six years ago due to an illnessPhoto credit: Caters news agency
She said she was

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She said she was “desperate” to lose her virginity, but all her friends said penetrating her was like “bumping into a brick wall”.Credit: Catering

Karen unknowingly spent most of her life suffering from vaginismus, a painful condition that causes the vaginal muscles to contract involuntarily when something enters them.

She has never been able to insert a tampon, swab, or have penetrative sex, which she said became “very uncomfortable” with lovers.

It wasn’t until Karen was 31 that she was officially diagnosed with vaginismus and was treated for it.

After being cured of the disorder, she was finally able to lose her virginity at the age of 32 with her “very patient” husband Joe Johnson, now 41.

She said the first time “wasn’t romantic at all” but has a very healthy sex life now.

The couple from Wesley Chapel, Florida, USA had all their dreams come true after getting pregnant.

Karen gave birth to her miracle baby Matthew, now three months old – something the new mom thought might never happen.

She said: “Ever since I was a child I wanted to be a mother. When I realized there was a problem (vaginismus) I was so worried that my dream would never come true.

“It’s a dream come true with Matthew. I never thought this would be possible but here we are, I am so grateful.”

When Karen was younger, she was amazed when all her friends faced the same sexual problem.

She said: “I knew something was wrong with me after trying to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time when I was 16.

“Before that I had never tried to use tampons, so this was the first attempt at penetration. But no matter what we did, he just couldn’t get it in. It was so awkward.

“I thought it might be because it was our first time. So we waited a bit and tried again.

“But we couldn’t do that. He said it was like hitting a brick wall and he just couldn’t get in. We just gave up.”

“The same thing happened with other friends when I was in my twenties.

“Everyone said exactly the same thing. That it was like a wall.”

After several failed attempts. Karen said she has given up having sex and would always lie to her partners by telling them she wanted to wait until marriage.

I couldn’t believe I could finally have sex. i was so proud I felt like I had just won a race I was training for.

karen

Inside, she says she “desperately” lost her virginity.

She said: “Nothing worked. i was so depressed I really wanted to have sex, but I couldn’t.

“I just told every partner I had that I wanted to wait to get married. But that wasn’t true at all.

“I’ve heard the word vaginismus but never really knew what it was.”

It wasn’t until Karen went to see a pelvic floor specialist at 31 that she was officially diagnosed with vaginismus.

Vaginismus can completely disrupt a woman’s sex life and relationships and cause her to lose all confidence in the bedroom.

Unfortunately, knowing that sex causes pain can actually make the condition worse as the body learns to associate penetration with pain, causing the vaginal muscles to tighten as protection.

Sex therapy, pelvic floor exercises, and vaginal trainers—objects of different sizes used over time—can cure the condition.

Karen said, “After just four months of therapy, I was healed. At 32, I was finally able to have sex for the first time.

“That was one of the best days of my life. I was so happy to finally lose my virginity and have sex with the man I love.

“I couldn’t believe I could finally have sex. i was so proud I felt like I had just won a race I was training for.

“It wasn’t romantic at all. But it meant the world to me.

“We’ve done it more and more over time. It took us about a year to really get into the groove of things.”

wonder child

The couple immediately tried to have a baby but encountered some difficulties.

Karen said, “It took a long time and I kept thinking, ‘There’s no way I’m giving up.’

“I knew I had worked too hard and overcame too much. I knew in my heart that I was destined to be a mother and that in time it would happen.

“After trying for a couple of years, we had no luck, so we went to the doctor to get checked out.

“While there was nothing ‘wrong’ about either my husband or me, our age played a big part. Being a little older made it harder to get pregnant.

“We decided not to waste any more time and do IVF. Our first egg retrieval resulted in zero embryos and we were devastated.

“We decided to try again and an embryo resulted. That was implanted and it worked – we were pregnant.”

Little Matthew was born via an unplanned cesarean section in November 2021 and weighed 7 pounds 12 ounces after 24 hours of labour.

Karen said she and her husband are happier than they ever thought possible — and she’s now helping to spread awareness about vaginismus to help other women get through what she’s been through.

The mother added: “I never thought someone could bring so much joy into our lives. Those were the best three months of my life.

“Seeing him grow every day has been such an amazing experience and I didn’t know I could love like that.

“He can’t even speak yet but he makes us laugh every day so I can’t wait to see what’s to come as time goes on.

“I thought for a very long time that this would never be possible because of vaginismus.

“But as I put in the work and effort to overcome this, I knew it would be possible. My only regret is that I didn’t get help sooner.

“If you have vaginismus, seek the help that is available because if I can, so can you.

“The reward at the end is worth it, I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life.”

With her, Karen was finally able to lose her virginity at the age of 32

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Karen was finally able to lose her virginity at the age of 32 with her “very patient” husband Joe Johnson, now 41Credit: Catering
Karen gave birth to her baby Matthew through IVF after trying for several years to conceive naturally

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Karen gave birth to her baby Matthew through IVF after trying for several years to conceive naturallyCredit: Catering
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